Please…Don’t be Stupid. Commit!

“Tell me with whom you consort with and I will tell you who you are.”- Goethe


Studies show that our social environment plays a major role in our perception of life and our commitment to change. If you feel you are developmentally stuck in a growth rut and lack the ability to commit, take a look at these three main areas of your life:

-Relationships (who you spend time with)

-Place (where you spend your time)

-Activity (what you do with your time)

Seneca, a famous Stoic philosopher had this to say who and how we spend our time:

“Choose someone whose way of life as well as words, and whose very face as mirroring the character that lies behind it, have won your approval. Be always pointing him out to yourself either as your guardian or as your model. There is a need, in my view, for someone as a standard against which our characters can measure themselves. Without a ruler to do it against you won’t make crooked straight.”

This is simply where the rubber meets the road. If any of the above mentioned are problems, what actions are you willing to take to change your situation?

-Are you willing to change relationships?

-Are you willing to spend time in different places?

-Are you willing to change your current activities?

If you’re not will to do different, be prepared to have much of the same.

Getting stuck in a growth rut is really a reflection of our inability to commit to change. The person who we’ve become is known and comfortable; we know what to expect, and the pain isn’t unbearable…yet.

This type of lifestyle can go on for years and years; that is until the pain of staying the same exceeds the fear of the unknown.

Gail Sheeby once said, “Growth demands a temporary surrender of security.” 

Acknowledgement is the first step in the growth process because it requires you to relinquish an attachment to a false identity. When you surrender the false self, the true self emerges.

It’s also an understanding that things don’t change unless we change.

There is no doubt that changing is a hard thing to do…but so is staying the same.

So the next time you’re feeling like your drowning in the sea of life, pull yourself up with these three easy steps:

-Honest introspection

-Goal specificity

-Commitment to the process

“The irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating -- in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around like rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.”
― Anne Morris