Friday, October 19, 2018

CBT Disputing Negative Thoughts

If you find that you are feeling angry, depressed, upset, or anxious, take this as a clue to examine your thinking. Make a habit of using your negative feelings as a cue to begin the Disputing Negative Thoughts practice.
Reality Testing

-What is my evidence for and against my thinking?
-Are my thoughts factual, or are they just my interpretations?
-Am I jumping to negative conclusions?
-How can I find out if my thoughts are actually true?

If your thought is a core belief, write it out and ask yourself, “Is this thought 100% true ALL of the time?”. Begin creating a list of any and all instances you find that are not true.
Look for Alternate Explanations

-Are there any other ways that I could look at this situation?
-What else could this mean?
-If I were being positive, how would I perceive this situation?

Put Things in Perspective
When you are feeling upset, you are likely to think about things in a way that is much more extreme than the actual situation. This can make the negative feelings a lot worse. Putting things in perspective, can help you to reduce this extreme self-talk.

-Is this situation as bad as I am making out to be?
-What is the worst thing that could happen? How likely is it?
-What is the best thing that could happen?
-What is most likely to happen?
-Is there anything good about this situation?
-Will this matter in five years’ time?

Use Goal-directed Thinking – Recognizing that your current way of thinking might be self-defeating can sometimes motivate you to look at things from a different perspective.

-Is thinking this way helping me to feel good or to achieve my goals?
-What can I do that will help me solve the problem?
-Is there something I can learn from this situation, to help me do it better next time?

Do a cost-benefit analysis of believing your thought. Ask yourself, “How will it help me to believe this thought?” and “How does it hurt me to believe this thought?”. Write down your answers and decide if believing this thought is more harmful than good. If so practice choosing to let it go, or opening to the possibility that your thought is not true.
History
This technique is one of the core practices of cognitive therapy. This direction in therapy was mainly pioneered by Aaron Beck.

Saturday, January 20, 2018

Journal to Self-Awareness

Journaling is the first step in self-awareness. A thought is fleeting; a paragraph is reflective.
Let’s start this year off with a different approach. Rather than looking externally for “fixes”, let’s look internally for “resolutions”.

There are many ways to self-reflect, but keeping a journal and reading it out loud is one of the best ways to gain insight to your thoughts which create your universe.

Epictetus said, “Write them, read them aloud, and talk to yourself and others about them.”

Journaling is important because it creates a space amid the relentless mind chatter from which to pause, collect, organize and untangle. Journaling enables us to set things down, sort through them, unpack them, understand them and heal them. I believe that keeping a journal is one of the healthiest things that we can do, fundamental to emotional well-being and on a par with regular exercise, a healthy diet, and plenty of sleep.

I’ve included several Stoic thoughts that can serve as a reminder as well as providing a clearer view regarding our perspectives.

As Marcus Aurelius’ said, “The quality of your life will be determined by the quality of your thoughts”

Now put your thoughts down on paper!

Clarity — Remember, the most important task is to separate the things that are in your control from those that are not in your control. This allows us to get real clarity about what to focus on in life.
 “It’s not activity that disrupts people, but false conceptions of things that drive them mad.” Seneca

Equanimity (Mental calmness) Passions are the source of suffering. “A real man doesn’t give way to anger and discontent,” Marcus Aurelius reminded himself, “and such a person has strength, courage and endurance—unlike the angry and the complaining.” Calmness is strength.

Awareness — Accurate self-assessment is essential. Know thyself, was the dictum from the Oracle at Delphi. Knowing your strengths is just as important as knowledge of your weakness, and ignorance of either is ego.
“Nothing is more hostile to a firm grasp on knowledge than self-deception.” Zeno

Unbiased Thought —command to himself. Our life is colored by our thoughts, and so to be driven by this bias or that bias—this delusion or that false impression—is to send your whole existence off-kilter.
“Objective judgement, now at this very moment,” -Marcus Aurelius

Right Action — It’s not just about clear thoughts, but clear thoughts that lead to clear and right action.
“First, tell yourself what kind of person you want to be; then do what you have to do.”-Epictetus
“Don’t talk about what a good man is like. Be one.” -Marcus Aurelius

Problem Solving — Are you vexed by daily obstacles or do you throw yourself into solving them? “This is what we’re here for,” Seneca said. No one said life was easy. No one said it would be fair. Let’s make progress where we can.

Duty “Whatever anyone does or says,” “I’m bound to the good...Whatever anyone does or says, I must be what I am and show my true colors.” -Marcus Aurelius
He was talking about duty. Duty to his country, to his family, to humankind, to his talents, to the philosophy he had learned.  (Don’t preach your philosophy; embody it!)

Pragmatism — If the food is bitter, toss it out. If there are brambles in the path, go around. Don’t expect perfection. Be ready to be flexible and creative. Life demands it.

Resiliency — Do you want to count on good luck (passive) or be prepared for anything that happens (prepared)? “Let come what may” because we have cultivated inner-strength and resilience.

Kindness — Be hard on yourself, and understanding of others. See every person you meet, as an opportunity for kindness and compassion. Nothing can stop you from being virtuous, from being good. That’s on you.

Amor Fati — Don’t just accept what happens, love it! Because it’s for the best. Because you will make it for the best. Embrace everything with a smile. Every obstacle provides a path for growth…for adaptation

Memento Mori — We’re strong but we’re not invincible. We were born mortal and nothing can change that.

Seneca said, “prepare our minds as if we’d come to the very end of life.” Let us put nothing off, let us live each moment fully.